School - School boy had sex

A boy comes home from school with a big smile on his face.

So his mom asks "did anything happen at school today?"

The boy says "I had sex"

The mom exclaims "WHAT!?"

The boy says "I had sex with my english teacher"

So the mom tells the boy "when your father gets home, he's gonna have a serious talk with you"

Later on when the dad gets home he tells his son, "so I hear you had sex today."

"Today you have become a man"

"This is an occasion to celibrate"

"What do you say we go out for some icecream?"

The boy replies, "not right now dad, my ass is killing me."